I hate birthdays. I hate gifts, I hate birthday cake, and I hate that for sixteen consecutive birthdays now people insist on making a big fucking deal out of them (I guess when I was little I didn't care as much because of the presents that would "win me over" so to speak). I'm not one of those types who cares about ageing, as 16 is still very young imo. I deeply resent being the center of attention, when you're sitting there surrounded by presents and cake and loads of people singing "Happy Birthday to you" in an off-key half-hearted manner. Everyone's either waiting for you to say something profound, or cry and say "This is the best birthday ever!", both of which never happen because I don't give a shit. All you can do is just sit there and smile awkwardly. I'm one day older than I was yesterday but I don't feel it, and why would I? There isn't even a fucking point to birthdays. Instead of "Happy Birthday", I'd much rather hear something more direct which essentially means the same thing, e.g "Good to see you still alive since last year". Assuming birthdays existed, which they do. Which displeases me - it's just an annual countdown to your inevitable demise, with cake. I don't even like cake. Today I went paintballing, because it wasn't something "birthday-ish". So it took mine and everyone else's mind off the fact it was my birthday. I'd happily sleep in the entire day if it meant nobody would make a fuss over my birthday. I dread them every year, no joke.

tl;dr: Birthdays are fucking pointless, and I hate anyone who tries to encourage me to celebrate them.